Random thoughts blended into words that can never do justice to them

15 years ago, life was simple. America was just another lesson in my geography book. But today America means a lot.

It is here that I became a mother; it is here that I leaned to drive; it is hear that I built a home and family to continue my legacy. (Ok, excuse the over emphasis). These may seem like simple things but to a woman, it is almost everything that she can ask for. Being happy and free.

Even though we probably are living the dream I miss my homeland. Every time I cook I am reminded of the aromas from back home. The craving for some childhood comfort foods that I still miss.... their taste lingers upon my lips. Hot Nescafe at bed time brought my mum so I can stay up and work on my assignments. A dire need to be as efficient as possible. I miss the days that the only thing I had to worry about was exams and turning in projects. Hours in front of the computer with a few minutes of dial up connection. I wish I can substitute the word 'miss' with something stronger. But my limited vocabulary does not allow me to do so. I have spent my life time trying to be a perfectionist.... trying to do everything meticulously  but lately I've been learning to relax. To savor and enjoy the moment instead of cramming multiple tasks in the goal of achieving efficiency and effectiveness simultaneously. I'm learning to embrace and love myself. I am also thinking more about death. I guess we all, in our own ways learn to deal with the fact that our grey hairs are increasing, our wrinkles are beginning to form and that our posture is not as upright as it once was. My greatest fear next to death, is old age and loneliness. Who will take care of me? Will I be a botheration?